Tuesday, July 13, 2004

Tim + Loren

Late this Monday evening, I was regretting the fact that I had not updated today. I was considering checking in with a brief bit of trivia, and content to wait until I had some motivation. Around midnight, the perennially dysfunctional duo of Tim and Loren had their daily dustup. Evidently, Loren was upset that Tim (Gary’s son) had lied about frequenting local gentlemen’s clubs this weekend. Tim, whom I have reason to suspect was stoned, was not too bothered by her dissatisfaction. That was until he left Tim at my house with no ride home. After two nondescript telephone conversations, she came back to pursue further remarks. They talked for approximately ten minutes. At the end of their conversation, Tim came inside the house and took me up on my offer of a ride home. So I gathered my Michelle Branch CD’s and took a ride in the Hyundai. Not surprisingly, I quickly discovered that Loren was following us. We broke paths- she took Military and we cruised the Interstate- but both arrived at Northlake Boulevard within seconds of one another. I took Tim to his house and drove back to my residence. They are likely squabbling still as I write this diary 30 minutes after the fact.

The larger fact is that we have watched dozens of similar conflicts over the course of their four-year relationship. I have come to the conclusion that Loren thrives on the constant frigid banter. In many ways, I genuinely feel sorry for her. She has admitted that she takes two dozen medications on a daily basis. Many are for psychiatric ails. It is very troubling to see an individual so inclined to engage in conflict. Both Gary and I care deeply for her. She confided to me that Gary was like her second father while her biological father spent time at the crossbar hotel. I have had enough conversation with her to conclude she is a totally lovely and decent individual. I just fear that she’s taking her life in an unhealthy direction. No rational individual would want to be so disturbed so frequently. I look at her and am sure she could have any gentleman she wanted. In my humble estimation, she is a very pretty 21 year old. I would say she is “hot”, but I’m attempting to keep the discourse tame. Unfortunately, her heart belongs to a guy with nearly as many flaws. Tim, whom I have grown to respect more in recent months, is not a bad person by any stretch of the imagination. However, he is chronically unemployed and just now struggling to get headed in the right direction.

Some might suggest that these concerns are best voiced directly to the involved parties. There’s a school of though suggesting she is chronically troubled and would have the same problem with any man. I believe that is true to an extent, but a more mature guy could handle her emotions better. On the other hand, I wonder if she is a person who can’t be happy without some turmoil in her life. After evaluating this, I believe the time has come for her to make a judgment. After four years, she knows Tim very well. She must decide whether he is worth the risk of continuing a relationship with. He has a load of potential, but can also be a difficult person to deal with. My advice would be this simple: Take a hard look at the situation and decide whether the rewards outweigh the risks.

Finally, if you’ve been keeping up with my entries the last few days, you’ll remember that Loren is one of Jackie’s best friends. I still plan to expand on that topic by the end of this week.


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