Monday, September 27, 2004

Dolphin Debauchery

Sorry for the delay in posting. I had to go get another touch of Scotch Whiskey.

The Dolphins stink! Nobody would argue that point. I've paid my $500 and plan to attend the rest of the season's six home games. There's something about football that makes attending games so much fun.

Last night, my cousin Shaun and I went to the Pittsburgh game. I noticed that as time went by, our discussion turned to less pure matters. It began when we stopped at the Pompano Beach turnpike service plaza. We discussed the rather attractive female J-E-T-S fans that were stationed at the Sbarro's. If I were feeling like I do tonight, I'd have gone over and worked my magic. Unfortunately, I was only able to utter some nominal pleasantries.

When we arrived at the game, it was pouring down raining. We eagerly awaited the well-endowed females to arrive. Preferrably, they'd be wearing white colored tops. As a result, we could better observe their amble busoms.

I'm wondering if that makes me a bad person. Am I perverse to notice attractive women, even the kind that would never talk to me in a million years? If they wear such flattering outfits, isn't their lust what they truly desire? They want to taunt me, pointing out the lust of my desire. I try not to appear too obvious, although the high-fives with my cousin Shaun might have been a bit much.

It's the one saving grace of this Dolphins season. Here in South Florida, there is never an absence of females willing to show off their goods. For now, I'll keep up the lewd thoughts and inappropriate gestures until an angry significant other comes and puts me in my place.

Don't think I've ever written such a thoroughly disorganized post. This could have been so much better an exposition had I put more time and sobriety into it. Maybe I'll explore it more at a later time, possibly after the J-E-T-S game.


Blogger Eric Cioffoletti said...

LOL! Wow Taylor. Yeah this post is up and down and all over the place. Maybe its the drinking? Or maybe its the intoxicating effect of the female ass?

I don't think you are perverse for noticing hot girls. Hey, even married men do it. I do it. You do it. Every guy does it. Let's not kid ourselves there.

And yeah let's make it official: the Dolphins suck. That won't make me stop watching them either so don't worry.

September 28, 2004 at 2:00 AM  
Blogger tsias said...

This topic deserves more analysis than I was willing to give it last night.

The hardcore feminists on DU think it's an outrage that guys behave like this. They think even noticing or giving a momentary glance amounts to sexism.

If you have the courage, post something on DU about this subject. I'll guarantee you 100 + replies.

September 28, 2004 at 12:50 PM  

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